Where the Girls Are

This is a post that I am torn about writing.  I've thought about it for a long time and tried to evaluate how the following experiences have impacted me. So, here it goes and I'm hopeful that no one will find it insensitive.

The Young Women's program is a youth group for girls 12-18 in the LDS Church.  It is a class on Sunday and has various other activities throughout the week and over the course of the year.  It is a wonderful and inspired program and truly impacts those involved with it throughout their entire lives.  Participating as a youth helped to solidify my testimony, learn Gospel truths, provided me with a foundation and framework to learn how to serve those around me, and introduced and endeared me to wonderful women who augmented the examples and teachings of my parents.  It taught me to associate with other girls who shared similar standards and provided a refuge from the world.  It taught me that I was a daughter of God, and that as such, I was entitled to knowledge and blessings if I lived my life in harmony with the teachings of Jesus Christ.  This program celebrates womanhood and encourages and edifies us.

These experiences that I had as a teenager participating in this program bless my life daily, even now. I had wonderful leaders, who loved me, even and especially when I was hard to love.  Karen, Caren, Kathy and Debbie; your influence is still felt and reflected daily in my home and indirectly in the lives of my children. You helped to make me the woman I am today and you continue to inspire me.

Likewise, over the past four years my girls have been incredibly blessed and edified by the women in the Young Women's program.  It's always good to know that there are other strong, safe and capable women; helping me to look out for my family.

This post becomes difficult for me because in my mind, the opportunity to serve in Young Women's is one of those callings in the Church that you have to campaign for.  There are only so many spaces available and there are a lot of women who want to work with the teenage girls.  After a while, it starts to feel a lot like a popularity contest.  I know it's not, and that the choices are inspired.... but in some ways that makes it more hard.  That feels like my Heavenly Father likes all the other women in the ward better than me.

I have spent the majority of my adult life wanting to serve in the Young Women's organization.  It started out as a casual wish, but after a while, it kind of seemed like everyone else was getting the opportunity besides me.  It was enough to make me honestly wonder "what is wrong with me?"  Why was it that nobody in a position of priesthood leadership thought that I wouldn't be good serving in that capacity.  This realization is embarrassing and uncomfortable for me to admit.  But..... honesty.  The only thing I can think to compare it to was the idea of the childless woman sitting in Sacrament Meeting on Mother's Day; such was the depth of my despair.  When they would have a change to be made, like a new teacher, I would come unglued.  And it's totally embarrassing to be running into the bathroom and trying not to let everyone see me cry.  And then, my girls started in Young Women's and I really started to feel bad.

When Erin was old enough to go on Pioneer Trek at 14, my parents gave me some great advice and told me it would be an opportunity missed if I wasn't there to pick her up.... the see her in action and to listen to her experience without distractions for either of us.

I had recently gone into talk to our Bishop about my hurt feelings and frustrations.  I thought it might make me feel better.  And in some regards it did, because I was able to let the Bishop know that despite the fact that I deal with a different set of circumstances than most stay-at-home moms (with Matt's travel) that I was willing and able to make sacrifices for my church calling.  After this talk, I asked the Bishop if it would be okay if I drove up to Wyoming to pick up Erin after she was done.  He assured me it would be fine.  Well, a couple of days later, I got a call from one of the youth leaders informing me that there was no need for me to be there.  Even at the time, I knew the spirit in which the call was intended: it was a long way to drive and they didn't need help shuttling kids.  But I wanted to go and being told not to was devastating.  This was the Sunday before Trek and I was so upset, I couldn't even go to church that day.  Instead I took a long drive by myself and ended up at my parent's cabin... trying to figure out what the heck was wrong with me?  At this point, I was mostly mad at myself because I knew my reaction was not appropriate.  It just all felt so personal.  So I prayed.... again..... about serving in Young Women's.  But instead of asking "why not?" I started to ask for the Lord's help in allowing me to be okay with the situation.  To admit that He knows more than me and that although I didn't understand why, and it still hurt, that I would need to learn to accept it.  Easier said than done; but it was a valuable lesson that I learned.

And then, nine months later, I got my chance.  Finally!  I was called to serve in the 14-16 year-old age group and to help the Young Women with any musical numbers or needs they may have.  I was so excited.  And I am still so excited.  I have loved the opportunity to get to know the girls in our ward better, and to also get to know some of the other women in my ward better.  And, I get to be with my girls, which is really fun.  I love coming up with ideas for my monthly lessons and for the activities that I get to help with.  Heck, I even love Girls Camp; or especially love it, depending on the day.  I love my calling and I really, really hope that I get to stay in until my girls are done at 18.  Now that may or may not happen, and if the Lord has other plans for me I promise that I will be open to them.... but if you're reading this Bishop Samuelson, please don't ever release me.   This desperation (because that's what it is) to be involved in this capacity influences the way I serve more than anything. Which is to say, I have been known to go over the top at times, but I really love the fun stuff.  So, I'm going to post a few of the activities and lessons that I have planned; not because they're better than others, but because I get nearly all of my ideas from the internet and blogs and I'm grateful that folks take the time to share their ideas.  Besides, I want to record all the fun for posterity.

Understand that these have not all occurred in the last few weeks, but rather over the course of the last year or so.  These are the things that I have pictures of.  And it has to be said, that I have found a kindred spirit in Kelli Hintze, our recently-released YW President because she says that "there's nothing that can be done that can't be made better by overdoing."  

These are the necklaces I made the girls in my class for my lesson in January. 

It was "Who Am I and Who Can I Become?"

When I first picked this lesson, I was drawn to the idea of a snowflake.  They all come from the same place, just like us, but they are all different.  Some of them land in the mountains, some of them land on the freeway.  They can do very little about the situations they find themselves in, but they can be their best self; put forward their best effort.

I really liked this Mormonad.  It says, “You are unique” and cites D&C 76:24. “That by him, and through him, and of him, the worlds are and were created, and the inhabitants thereof are begotten sons and daughters unto God.”

He knows us; individually.  He is aware of what makes us unique and beautiful.  He also knows the end from the beginning and although he doesn’t change whether we land in the mountains or on I-15, he is there with us every step of the way.  He allows us to be who we are and encourages to be better.  Chances are in this life we will always be doubling back and retracing steps, looking at going a different direction and then master a concept that is hard for us.  We will keep studying and keep on retaking the test until we get it right; but God is patient and he loves us.

Like snowflakes, no two necklaces are alike.  When (and if) you wear it, I want you to remember that you are one-of-a-kind.  That you are God’s child and that he loves you.  STRIVE to be the best version of yourself you can be.  Look to help and bless others; to be a true disciple of Christ.  Understand that our mortal journeys are meant to be a period of instruction; of trial and error.  Just keep trying.  

This was from our awesome Personal Progress Activity in January.  We ate lots of little fun rainbow treats and worked on our Personal Progress.  The girls made little holders for their books and as a YW group, we decided to redouble our efforts to get our awards.

So this was from our activity in January where our leaders and girls went to support some of their fellow Young Women at their Dance/Drill Competition.  I love this picture because being supportive of each other is so important in this life.

This was from our visit to the Provo City Center Temple Open House.  It was beautiful.... and of course we had to stop and get hot dogs after.

The next week we were back in Provo again for the Cougarettes concert.  The girls had a great time and although dance is not really my thing, I was totally impressed with the performance we saw and the examples that the Cougarettes provide to our Young Women.

 

Okay, this awesomeness was not mine... but our YW President and Laurel class did such a fantastic job with New Beginnings.  Honestly, when Kelli said she wanted to do a Minions theme, I was like "I'm not sure how I feel about that."  Mostly because as the mom of a preschooler, I spend way too much time in the world of minions.  But the whole thing turned out so cute.  My contribution was the cute arrows (I didn't make them, my friend Becky did, but I had the idea.)  The little sign says "Pressing Forward with Both Direction and Magnitude."    

The scripture theme for YW this year is 2 Nephi 31:20

In May, we celebrated our mothers and had an awesome Mad Hatter's Tea Party.  The girls brought their moms and we at little finger sandwiches and learned lots of new things about the girls and their moms.  It was also an opportunity for me to reuse the Alice in Wonderland stuff I had collected for my PTA Very Merry Unbirthday Party.

And then, we were in charge of our combined activity with the Young Men in May and we had a Lion King movie night.  The kids enjoyed all sorts of jungle themed treats while we watched the movie.

Also in May, I taught a lesson on how the girls could make their prayers more meaningful.  Thanks to the awesomeness that is The Redheaded Hostess, I printed out these books for the girls to fill out and learn about improving their relationship with Heavenly Father.  I told the girls if they finished their books, they would get a pie.  Not everyone did it, but the pie was a great motivator.

The highlight of the Young Women's calendar is Girls Camp.  It's a super fun time where all the girls are together and where there is little to no cell phone reception.  There are groups of girls that this situation would be a recipe for disaster; but not with our girls.  They all tend to get along really well and look out for each other.  This year was Stake Camp.  Which means we didn't have to plan much and we could basically just show up and enjoy the great outdoors.  We went to Heber Valley Camp.... which is an awesome campground.

This was the crew on the day we left.  Notice the clean hair, clothes and smiles.

  

 One of the greatest parts about Heber Valley Camp is the fact that there's a big lake the girls can canoe on.  They had a blast on the water and really enjoyed the hour that they got to spend on the water.  Afterwards, an impromptu volleyball game broke out and everyone had a great time.

Arguably the best part of camp this year (besides testimony meeting) was the night we presented our skit we presented.  We did an offshoot of Carpool Karaoke... and despite the fact that the sound system kept cutting out because some of the other wards were throwing water around and getting the connections wet, our girls kept going and did so awesome!

One of the most important things that happens at Girls Camp is the hair braiding. Seeing that I have never had hair long enough to braid, the whole thing is kind of lost on me, but over the years, when they start braiding, they start bonding.  This year, our chief stylist was cute Madison Adams.  She has some mad braiding skills.  Almost as fun as seeing all these girls with their braids, was seeing them at church the following Sunday with crazy, crimpy hair.

These pictures were taken the night of our Testimony Meeting; an opportunity for anyone who wants to to stand up and share their thoughts and feelings.  At this point in the week, all of the pretense is gone.  The girls have done hard things together and have been humbled before each other.  The spirit present at testimony meeting is the reason that the girls love coming to camp and the reason that all the leaders put so much time and effort into camp preparations.  This year we had several girls who have issues they're struggling with.... death, divorce, disease.  But experiences like these serve to remind the girls that Heavenly Father is mindful of their struggles and that the Atonement can work in your life if you'll open yourself up.

This is the group photo before we all left to come home.  Although we all look tired and a little dirty, we were all still smiling.  Everyone had so much fun and I know that the relationships between all of us were strengthened and they were reminded once again why we are not sent to earth alone.... but with the folks we need to bring out our best and to help us through our trials.

So, if we're going to talk about people who bring out the best in us, it would have to be these women. These ladies, plus the others who couldn't be with us, have made a HUGE difference in my life.  We are all lucky enough to be able to learn from each other and to be able to offer support when needed.  As women in the Church we are truly blessed by the association we share with our sisters.  

I love this painting because it represents the spirit of cooperation and love that we should strive to have in our hearts.

But wait, there's more.  This year we were lucky enough to have a Youth Conference with just our ward.  We haven't done one of these in a really long time and we were lucky enough to be able to stay at the Hintze house in Huntsville.  They are always so generous in letting our youth stay there.  I know that some of the funnest times our young women have had have been at the Huntsville house.

 

 I am so grateful that I have finally gotten the opportunity to work with the youth.  It has been a real blessing in my life and I have really grown spiritually.  Probably tempting fate by publishing this one.

SaveSave