I actually really love this quote because it takes into consideration the fact that our tribe may consist of more and varied folks than just our families. There are people that are sent into our lives for reasons that we may not be able to comprehend. People that present themselves in your life when you are not looking for new relationships, or when you can't see and understand the benefit that they can bring into your life. But, I have found if we will have an open mind, an accepting heart and a willingness to serve, that our lives are infinitely blessed by the associations that we have with the people in our lives.
Along the path of life, we encounter folks that change our lives for good. There have been lots of little things in my life that have made a big difference and I want to talk about a few of them today. Generally, I'm staying away from most of my family members.... not because I don't love them, but because I generally talk about them a lot and there's a degree of duty tied to our relationship. These wonderful examples are some of the people in my life that have touched me the most. They are in no particular order other than the warm fuzzy feelings that I have felt as I have reflected on my relationships and have counted my blessings.
- Deanna Ball. This spunky gal married my cousin. Coincidentally it was the day Princess Diana died, just so you know. We don't live close to each other, but thanks the the Internet and the wonder of email, we spent a great deal of time communicating back and forth while we were pregnant with our kids. Our oldest girls have stayed good friends and I'm excited that Marisa is coming to stay for a few days over the Christmas break. We went to Yellowstone with their family this summer and had a great time. This is what I love about Deanna..... she is just as irreverent as me and cracks me up! She is an awesome mom who is SOOOO real and she expects her kids to tow the line. She sets high standards for her family, she supports her husband in his career as a State Trooper even though it means he's gone a lot. She's my bargain shopping idol, she loves to take her family on adventures (they did a 10-week cross-country tour in an RV last year), she's done roller derby and I know that if I'm struggling as a mom, that she will understand. Just to give you an idea of her sense of humor, this was the picture from their Christmas card this year.
That's her and Snoop Dog. She writes "I'm kind of a big deal" and the seal on the back of the envelope said "Snoop and Deanna." We are still laughing over this!
- Lisa Astling. I know I've mentioned this lady before. Through dumb luck or divine intervention, we were blessed to move into the neighborhood about the same time and our kids ages line up roughly. We got to know each other because we were assigned to be Visiting Teaching companions, but I'll tell you that despite the fact that I pretty much suck in that capacity, Lisa is the real deal and a true friend. She has saved my bacon too many times to count: helping with school projects, watching kids, forgiving us when one of our children (who shall remain nameless) pooped in her back yard, made me dinner (pre-portioned servings of soup to heat up while recovering from surgery), and a slew of other things that are too numerous to name. She is generous with her time and her resources and is a friend that I know I can count on to love me and my family no matter what. I would do anything for this lady.... ANYTHING.
- Heather McEwan. I've known this girl almost as long as I've been alive. I've talked about her a lot and there's still more I could say. But I'll keep it short by saying she is loving and kind, looks for the best in everyone, believes that everyone is inherently good, and is a big fan of the "put your big girl panties on...." approach. She gets stuff done and has the luxury of being one of the few people in my life that can be totally honest with me and know that I will still talk to her. We are very different but we are also eerily similar. She holds me accountable and is always there to remind me of just how long we've known each other and to provide incentives to behave because she knows all the skeletons in my closet. A healthy dose of fear and accountability in a friendship isn't necessarily a bad thing.
- Lisa Forbush. I really can't articulate what this lady means to me. When she moved to my neighborhood, I could have never predicted the positive role that she would play in my life. I remember one night at book club when we were talking about anything and everything not related to books, and I made the comment that I loved it when she said hi to me at church because I felt like I wasn't invisible. Now, you probably didn't know that I feel this way sometimes, but like everyone, I get caught up in my own life and sometimes feel like nobody notices. And I'm going to admit here that sometimes, even though I know better, it is hard for me to want to go to church. I like it fine, I know it's true, I like my ward and I don't expect that to change anytime soon.... but sometimes I feel like it has to be a really good meeting to justify being better than no meeting at all. I need an attitude adjustment... anyway.... these feelings often lead me to feel like I hover around the edges. You add this to all my parenting and wifely insecurities, and sometimes church is an exercise in keeping my head down and trudging along. Well, Lisa changed all that because she is ALWAYS there with a smile and a hug for me. And it has made the biggest difference in my life. She is shoulder I cry on when I have a meltdown (which happens more than it should) and she is always the one to call and check on me or send a note when she thinks about me. I am so grateful to be on Lisa's radar.
- Jackie Smith. This girl "does fun." She was one of the first ladies to welcome us to the neighborhood and she is always there with a friendly wave and a smile. She is fun and upbeat and positive and understands the value of a well-timed Diet Coke. If I go missing from scheduled activities, she is the first to text and see how I am and what I need. She loves to travel and is always up for an adventure.
- Tiffin Tullis and Michelle Morris. These moms rock! I use them as guideposts in my life and they are never too busy to answer questions that I have about the way school works, how to handle a particular situation, to commiserate with or to love my kids. There's nothing better than sitting around a table with these ladies and laughing until we cry or pee..... mostly the former but not ruling out the latter. These terrific women have taught me not to sweat the small stuff, while still being committed to fighting the mama-bear fight. Can't imagine life without them.
- Kim Barton. Oh my..... can't say enough about Kim.... when I laugh with her it almost always is hard enough to make me pee. She is seriously one of the FUNNIEST people I know, but she is also one of the most grounded, self-sacrificing and service oriented ladies around. She has always been around to indulge my crazy PTA/YW ideas. She shows up with bagels from Einsteins and makes very unique birthday gifts.... we'll leave it at that. She sends my girls awesome Snap Chats and they (we all) love the Barton family beyond words. Plus, she's an excellent cook and someday, we're going to bump off Martha Stewart and get legit about our party planning.
Now, this is not an exhaustive list by any stretch of the imagination. In fact, if I am able to keep up my blogging momentum, I may make 2017 the year that I get to brag about my awesome girlfriends. Everyone needs a shout out every now and then. Like so many others, these ladies fill my bucket and help to give me the strength and fortitude to press forward. It takes a village and thank heavens I have a good one.
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