Erin - Who is she and how do I minister to her? Well, Erin is a bit of a dark horse. There are parts of her personality and demeanor that are stereotypical and predictable. As with any of us, she has those things in her life that she struggles with consistently. But just as she struggles, she has glorious moments where I catch a glimpse of her eternal potential and thank my Heavenly Father with every fiber of my being that she is mine on this earth.
Today in Young Women's we are talking about spiritual gifts, and as parents, we were asked to describe some of the spiritual gifts possessed by our daughters. Here is what I wrote about Erin:
You have been given the gift of compassion and understanding from your Heavenly Father. You are always willing and seeking to try and understand the motivations of those around you and to look for the best in everyone you encounter. You are kind and trusting and always try to give people the benefit of the doubt. You truly see the best in people and always try to see people as Heavenly Father may see them. You are a great example of loving your neighbor and you are really great at making those people who are in your life feel blessed and grateful to be there.
Erin is always on the lookout for those around her who need a little extra love. And she is NEVER too busy to give that love. Oftentimes that is to her own detriment. She struggles sometimes to do the things she needs to for herself, because she is doing things for others. I watch her now and I know how this story ends... with a lot of stress and feeling frazzled.... because this is something that I am still trying to learn how to balance. But, when I find myself overextended because of service to others, I am reminded by a couple of my favorite quotes, and I feel as though they apply to Erin (and Allie) as they are compassionate in their lives.
The first is one by one of my comedic, mothering idols Erma Bombeck:
The second quote is by Marjorie Pay Hinckley:
These thoughts exemplify Erin and all the lessons that she teaches me as I try to minister to her.
Next up is Allie. I can't tell you how many times over the course of the last few months that I have literally stopped what I am doing to thank my Heavenly Father for this girl. She is good and pure and despite the fact that sometimes that purity conflicts with my worldly self, she is a delight in our home and someone that I cannot live without. We often tease Allie and call her Mini-Mommy because she knows exactly what she should be doing and what everyone else should be doing. She is constantly keeping the rest of us at our house on task and she knows just how things should be. She is kind of like Jiminy Cricket.... and sometimes, I try and step on her. I don't always do so well at being corrected (by anyone) but the fact that she is right more often than not, usually leads me to roll my eyes and sneak to try and follow my original plan. She is every good thing from me and a lot of good things from Matt (although SHE will be the one rolling her eyes at this claim.) She keeps me on the path and ministers to me as much as I do to her. If I fall asleep while reading (or looking at Pinterest) it is Allie who pries the computer from my hands, removes my glasses and turns off my light. She checks and double checks the locks on the door every night, and despite the fact that she is a tornado in the kitchen, she knows how to manage her time and get stuff done.
Here's what I have to say about Allie and her spiritual gifts:
You are a valiant spirit who has been blessed with an understanding of the Gospel and a strong desire to live as a disciple of Christ. You are thoughtful and deliberate in all your actions and this care and concern is reflected in the way that you associate with those around you. You are obedient and demonstrate a great respect for the commandments of our Heavenly Father. You try hard to be a good example and to do the right things even (and especially) when it's hard. You look for opportunities to serve those around you and you seek after that which is righteous. You are not afraid to share your testimony with others and you are diligent in strengthening this testimony.
I literally thank my Heavenly Father every day for this girl.
Jack: the Prince. He has lived a charmed life to be sure. My world was turned upside down when he was born and although I had never fancied myself as someone who felt they NEEDED to mother boys, I have been grateful since Day 1 that Heavenly Father sent him to me. He has a kind and tender heart, he loves his friends and his mom. He is always there to ask me how my day was and I know that when he is grown up I will miss the fact that he is so willing to come and give me a hug and tell me that he loves me. Ministering to Jack is getting a little tough. He is still a great kid, but he is straddling that line between child and man and trying to figure out how to keep his emotions in check and to find the right balance between loving and tough. Truth be told, I hope he always finds himself more on the side of loving (like his dad.) Jack sometimes struggles to follow directions and is at the point in his life where he asks often why he has to do this or that? He LOVES his friends and loves hanging out at our house. My girls have liked having friends over at our house, but I see the immediate future of my life being filled with loud and stinky teenage boys. Which is fine, provided that the "stinky" comes from all the right places (farts, feet and B.O.) as opposed to Axe body spray. Just so you know boys, despite what advertisers tell you, that is not a smell that most people like. Jack is kind and perceptive. He is loving; in our family and in his world at large. I hear stories from people often about Jack and the joy that he brings to their life. I am grateful to my Heavenly Father that he sent Jack to me. His doing so has helped me to lighten up (quite a bit) and to learn to appreciate the small things in life; like whittling, executing the perfect jump on your bike, climbing a tree and peeing for distance. I know there is a special place in heaven reserved for the mothers of boys and I can only hope that I become one good enough to at least visit that corner of paradise some day. Thank you Jack for introducing me to little boys.
William needs to know that he owes nearly everything in his little life to the influence of his cool older brother. When Jack was born, I was convinced that I had my hands full and that three was my limit. Well, I was right about my hands being full, but darn it all if there wasn't a good part of my heart that still had room to love another kid. I was so sure that Will was going to be a girl.... I was supposed to have a little girl! That was the plan. I could finally afford to shop at Gymboree and I had recommitted myself to really fighting over how her hair would be done. So, imagine my dismay and delight when we discovered that Will was coming to join us. Oh my goodness, how grateful I am for my Heavenly Father who knew that I would need this little boy with his impish grin and his hairy back in my life. He is smart as a whip and so creative. He is not as fearless as his older brother, but he is every bit as determined. He has my heart because he loves to snuggle with his mom, and despite the fact that his taste in television entertainment sometimes makes me want to bleach my eyeballs, I will be sad when I find myself watching Johnny Test alone on Netflix by myself on a Friday night. William is a good friend and loves to share. He is worried about others and always enquires after their welfare. This boy loves his dog Annie, like an unhealthy amount, but it's too cute to correct. He has big brown eyes that save him repeatedly and he knows it. He is starting to grow up and as I watch him soak up the lessons he learns in kindergarten, I know it will only be a short time before he surpasses me in just about every aspect of life that matters. He is going to do great things in life and I am so glad that he got to come to our family.
Life can be hard.... at least it feels like that. Kids are hard, especially considering that they don't come with any kind of an instruction manual. There are so many times that I honestly have no idea how best to proceed and I wonder what on earth my Heavenly Father was thinking when he decided to bless me with these fantastic kiddos. Thankfully, he knows the beginning from the end and sees us as we can be. I know that at some point, I will figure out how to be a good mom and to minister to my children effectively. My worry is, at that point, they'll be all grown up and out of the house. They won't care what I have to say and I'll be left with all my wisdom and no one to share it with. Thankfully, at this point, I think grandkids come into the mix. I am grateful for the opportunities to walk along this path of life with all the children that I am blessed enough to share it with.
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